Part Twenty-Eight: A Quarrel And A Plan
May. 16th, 2020 11:16 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sigridharemThe next day, Sigrid made arrangements for dinner with Katja, Sif, and Wolfgang. And, after a long consideration, sent Karl to make appointments for her with Sasha and Sebastian.
Unfortunately, Sebastian had other plans.
“Sebastian is taking one of his little holidays in the city,” Karl informed Sigrid. “He is expected to return early next week, no doubt with his coin depleted from dice and drinking.”
“Yes, I know Sebastian’s habits,” Sigrid said dryly. “Unfortunately they are not convenient for me today. I will see Sasha, and then I will make ready for the city.”
Karl’s eyebrows raised the slightest fraction, which was still more surprise than she’d seen out of him in many years. “The city?”
“Yes. Preferably in disguise.”
If his eyebrows remained at the same level, it was likely only because he had anticipated this much when she stated her intent to follow Sebastian. “Who will go with you?”
“Well, Klaus knows the city well,” Sigrid said thoughtfully. “Unfortunately that also means he’s a bit well known, and known as mine. We would not be inconspicuous together.”
The same was true of Sebastian, but then, once she had Sebastian she would no longer be particularly concerned with being inconspicuous.
A knock at the door startled her out of her thoughts. “Lady Sigrid?”
She recognized Sasha’s voice. “Come in.”
Looking a little abashed, Sasha stepped into the room, closing the door firmly behind him. “If you don’t mind… I could go to the city with you.”
Sigrid frowned. “You were eavesdropping?”
“Karl left the door open a fraction,” Sasha said defensively.
Sigrid glanced at Karl, who gave her a look that indicated he’d done no such thing. “We’ll set that aside for the time being, though I warn you that is a dangerous habit. You don’t know the city like Klaus does.”
“No,” Sasha admitted. “But I lived there for six months… so I do know it reasonably well. And I kept to myself, so no one would recognize me.”
“Can you protect the Princess?” Karl said sharply.
Sasha hesitated, but for only a moment. “Yes.”
Sigrid was not entirely convinced. “Do you know which taverns Sebastian frequents?”
“…The Dancing Deer is one.”
“And you know it?”
Sasha shrugged. “I lived above it for a while.”
It was hard to picture Sasha in that kind of rough environment, but then, she thought, after what he had endured it likely barely registered as intimidating to him.
“My lady,” Karl said. “Might I suggest taking Klaus in disguise as well?”
Karl’s tone betrayed nothing, but Sigrid knew him well enough to understand he did not trust Sasha.
“There is safety in numbers,” she said, carefully. “And Klaus does love to dress up.”
Karl inclined his head. “I will fetch him.”
Once Karl had gone, Sigrid turned to Sasha, but he spoke first.
“I know you didn’t send for me for pleasure. At least let me still be useful.”
He looked so dejected, it hurt Sigrid to see. “I wanted you to know I am investigating the situation.”
“With Wolfgang?” Sasha looked away. “You could have asked me before telling him.”
Sigrid frowned. “How did you know?”
“The way he looked at me this morning.” Sasha’s hand clenched and unclenched, as though he didn’t know what to do with it. “Will they all know then, soon enough?”
“No,” Sigrid said swiftly. “And I didn’t plan on telling Wolfgang, it just…” She hesitated. “I’m sorry. But he won’t tell a soul, I promise. He’s a good ally to have.” When Sasha didn’t reply, she couldn’t help adding, “How did he look at you?”
“Differently.”
She exhaled. “Come closer.”
He did so, with his eyes lowered.
Sigrid stood up, her hands flat on the desk. “Closer.”
Sasha approached until his thighs brushed against the other side of her desk, his hands folded behind his back.
She lifted one hand to touch his cheek, feeling his sharp intake of breath. “Did you miss me?”
“You know that I did,” Sasha whispered.
Sigrid smiled. “Once I’ve seen to it that Sebastian and Nikolaj are not disgruntled, I will call for you.”
He was silent, for a long moment. Then: “Okay.”
Sigrid stroked his cheek, letting her hand curl around the back of his neck. “Patience will serve us both in the end. Think of how sweet it will be when you return to my bed.”
She saw his throat bob as he licked his lips, reminding her how plush they were. “Yes.”
She sighed. “Listen. I could have you right here, but it wouldn’t make either of us feel better.”
Sasha’s eyes finally lifted to meet her gaze. “So let me help you bring Sebastian back. Don’t…” His voice faltered. “Don’t just call for me to tell me you’re trying to arrange my mess without me.”
“Is that what you think I’m doing?” Sigrid frowned, letting her hand drop. “Truly?”
“Isn’t it?” Sasha’s shoulders were shaking. “You’ll tell the whole harem soon, and they’ll all look down on me and despise me.”
His words struck Sigrid like a physical blow. “What? Why would you think they would look down on you?”
“Because they will,” Sasha said fiercely. “After all, I let myself be subjugated. And who is lower than a slave?”
“You were nine years old!” Sigrid slammed the desk with her hand, and Sasha jumped. “Klaus knows. Does he say such things to you?”
“…No.”
“Then where on earth is this coming from?” Sigrid closed her eyes, trying to calm herself. “No, I am not planning on telling Leifr or Nikolaj any time soon because they lack discretion. Nor Sebastian, though it would not matter to him in the slightest, I assure you. Mikael perhaps, but you cannot honestly think Mikael would turn his nose up at you any more than Klaus has!”
“I just… it’s all out of control, and I hate it!” Sasha clutched his head, sinking into a crouch so she had to walk around the desk to properly see him. “It feels like it’s not my secret anymore, and it scares me! When Kai found out he died!”
Sigrid paused, then knelt down beside Sasha. “Did you love Kai?”
“Yes!” Sasha sobbed.
She’d wrapped her arms around him before she could think, and he all but dove into her, holding her so tightly it was almost painful as his body shook with sobs.
As she stroked his hair, she couldn’t help but glance at the door, hoping Karl and Klaus would take their time.
Slowly, Sasha’s breathing grew more even, his sobs receding to sniffles, and he loosened his grip on Sigrid, as though reassured that she was still with him.
“I’m sorry for yelling at you,” Sigrid said gently, brushing his bangs out of his wet eyes. “It’s… difficult for me as well.”
Sasha let out something like a bitter laugh, which stung.
“Well, it is! I don’t want to go against my own mother, but obviously something has to be done!” Sigrid drew herself up, pulling her hands back. “And God help me if anyone just overheard that through the door like you overheard Karl and I talking about Sebastian in the city…”
“No…” Sasha swallowed, a serious expression on his face. “You’re right. It is hard on you, I just… didn’t want to think about it. And…” A slight smile crossed his face. “Don’t worry. I had to open the door and lean against it, and even then I think I missed a few words.”
Sigrid sighed, and stood. “I thought as much, but you really shouldn’t do that in future.”
“I know.” Sasha stood too, looking oddly more relaxed. “I’ve been beaten for it before.”
A polite knock on the door startled them both, but Sasha quickly scrubbed at his eyes and turned away from the door as Sigrid straightened up.
“Come in, Karl.”
Karl strode in, followed by a beaming Klaus.
“Karl wouldn’t tell me what this was about, but I know he asked for Sebastian and Sasha before… Sasha! Are we going to have a foursome?!”
Sasha let out a loud, uncharacteristic snort and the corner of Sigrid’s mouth twitched.
“No, darling. We are going into the city.”
“Oh good, that’ll be fun,” Klaus said cheerfully. “Hey, Sasha, have you ever been shopping at the farmer’s market? We should start there first!”
“I… It depends on what Lady Sigrid wants…” Sasha glanced at Sigrid, who inclined her head slightly to indicate he was being included.
Finally, Sasha gave her a real smile.
Ignoring Karl’s disapproving look, Sigrid leaned against the desk. “Well, we do have a mission, so we can’t just dilly-dally.”
“A mission!” Klaus lit up. “Don’t tell me… we’re going incognito?”
Sigrid smiled. “Yes.”
“That’s even better than a foursome!” Sasha punched the air. “We’re going to my costume closet, right now!”
“I don’t need a disguise,” Sasha said quickly, but Klaus laughed and threw his arm around Sasha’s shoulders.
“Sure, but you can’t go out in that! Everyone will know you came from the castle!”
Unfortunately, Sebastian had other plans.
“Sebastian is taking one of his little holidays in the city,” Karl informed Sigrid. “He is expected to return early next week, no doubt with his coin depleted from dice and drinking.”
“Yes, I know Sebastian’s habits,” Sigrid said dryly. “Unfortunately they are not convenient for me today. I will see Sasha, and then I will make ready for the city.”
Karl’s eyebrows raised the slightest fraction, which was still more surprise than she’d seen out of him in many years. “The city?”
“Yes. Preferably in disguise.”
If his eyebrows remained at the same level, it was likely only because he had anticipated this much when she stated her intent to follow Sebastian. “Who will go with you?”
“Well, Klaus knows the city well,” Sigrid said thoughtfully. “Unfortunately that also means he’s a bit well known, and known as mine. We would not be inconspicuous together.”
The same was true of Sebastian, but then, once she had Sebastian she would no longer be particularly concerned with being inconspicuous.
A knock at the door startled her out of her thoughts. “Lady Sigrid?”
She recognized Sasha’s voice. “Come in.”
Looking a little abashed, Sasha stepped into the room, closing the door firmly behind him. “If you don’t mind… I could go to the city with you.”
Sigrid frowned. “You were eavesdropping?”
“Karl left the door open a fraction,” Sasha said defensively.
Sigrid glanced at Karl, who gave her a look that indicated he’d done no such thing. “We’ll set that aside for the time being, though I warn you that is a dangerous habit. You don’t know the city like Klaus does.”
“No,” Sasha admitted. “But I lived there for six months… so I do know it reasonably well. And I kept to myself, so no one would recognize me.”
“Can you protect the Princess?” Karl said sharply.
Sasha hesitated, but for only a moment. “Yes.”
Sigrid was not entirely convinced. “Do you know which taverns Sebastian frequents?”
“…The Dancing Deer is one.”
“And you know it?”
Sasha shrugged. “I lived above it for a while.”
It was hard to picture Sasha in that kind of rough environment, but then, she thought, after what he had endured it likely barely registered as intimidating to him.
“My lady,” Karl said. “Might I suggest taking Klaus in disguise as well?”
Karl’s tone betrayed nothing, but Sigrid knew him well enough to understand he did not trust Sasha.
“There is safety in numbers,” she said, carefully. “And Klaus does love to dress up.”
Karl inclined his head. “I will fetch him.”
Once Karl had gone, Sigrid turned to Sasha, but he spoke first.
“I know you didn’t send for me for pleasure. At least let me still be useful.”
He looked so dejected, it hurt Sigrid to see. “I wanted you to know I am investigating the situation.”
“With Wolfgang?” Sasha looked away. “You could have asked me before telling him.”
Sigrid frowned. “How did you know?”
“The way he looked at me this morning.” Sasha’s hand clenched and unclenched, as though he didn’t know what to do with it. “Will they all know then, soon enough?”
“No,” Sigrid said swiftly. “And I didn’t plan on telling Wolfgang, it just…” She hesitated. “I’m sorry. But he won’t tell a soul, I promise. He’s a good ally to have.” When Sasha didn’t reply, she couldn’t help adding, “How did he look at you?”
“Differently.”
She exhaled. “Come closer.”
He did so, with his eyes lowered.
Sigrid stood up, her hands flat on the desk. “Closer.”
Sasha approached until his thighs brushed against the other side of her desk, his hands folded behind his back.
She lifted one hand to touch his cheek, feeling his sharp intake of breath. “Did you miss me?”
“You know that I did,” Sasha whispered.
Sigrid smiled. “Once I’ve seen to it that Sebastian and Nikolaj are not disgruntled, I will call for you.”
He was silent, for a long moment. Then: “Okay.”
Sigrid stroked his cheek, letting her hand curl around the back of his neck. “Patience will serve us both in the end. Think of how sweet it will be when you return to my bed.”
She saw his throat bob as he licked his lips, reminding her how plush they were. “Yes.”
She sighed. “Listen. I could have you right here, but it wouldn’t make either of us feel better.”
Sasha’s eyes finally lifted to meet her gaze. “So let me help you bring Sebastian back. Don’t…” His voice faltered. “Don’t just call for me to tell me you’re trying to arrange my mess without me.”
“Is that what you think I’m doing?” Sigrid frowned, letting her hand drop. “Truly?”
“Isn’t it?” Sasha’s shoulders were shaking. “You’ll tell the whole harem soon, and they’ll all look down on me and despise me.”
His words struck Sigrid like a physical blow. “What? Why would you think they would look down on you?”
“Because they will,” Sasha said fiercely. “After all, I let myself be subjugated. And who is lower than a slave?”
“You were nine years old!” Sigrid slammed the desk with her hand, and Sasha jumped. “Klaus knows. Does he say such things to you?”
“…No.”
“Then where on earth is this coming from?” Sigrid closed her eyes, trying to calm herself. “No, I am not planning on telling Leifr or Nikolaj any time soon because they lack discretion. Nor Sebastian, though it would not matter to him in the slightest, I assure you. Mikael perhaps, but you cannot honestly think Mikael would turn his nose up at you any more than Klaus has!”
“I just… it’s all out of control, and I hate it!” Sasha clutched his head, sinking into a crouch so she had to walk around the desk to properly see him. “It feels like it’s not my secret anymore, and it scares me! When Kai found out he died!”
Sigrid paused, then knelt down beside Sasha. “Did you love Kai?”
“Yes!” Sasha sobbed.
She’d wrapped her arms around him before she could think, and he all but dove into her, holding her so tightly it was almost painful as his body shook with sobs.
As she stroked his hair, she couldn’t help but glance at the door, hoping Karl and Klaus would take their time.
Slowly, Sasha’s breathing grew more even, his sobs receding to sniffles, and he loosened his grip on Sigrid, as though reassured that she was still with him.
“I’m sorry for yelling at you,” Sigrid said gently, brushing his bangs out of his wet eyes. “It’s… difficult for me as well.”
Sasha let out something like a bitter laugh, which stung.
“Well, it is! I don’t want to go against my own mother, but obviously something has to be done!” Sigrid drew herself up, pulling her hands back. “And God help me if anyone just overheard that through the door like you overheard Karl and I talking about Sebastian in the city…”
“No…” Sasha swallowed, a serious expression on his face. “You’re right. It is hard on you, I just… didn’t want to think about it. And…” A slight smile crossed his face. “Don’t worry. I had to open the door and lean against it, and even then I think I missed a few words.”
Sigrid sighed, and stood. “I thought as much, but you really shouldn’t do that in future.”
“I know.” Sasha stood too, looking oddly more relaxed. “I’ve been beaten for it before.”
A polite knock on the door startled them both, but Sasha quickly scrubbed at his eyes and turned away from the door as Sigrid straightened up.
“Come in, Karl.”
Karl strode in, followed by a beaming Klaus.
“Karl wouldn’t tell me what this was about, but I know he asked for Sebastian and Sasha before… Sasha! Are we going to have a foursome?!”
Sasha let out a loud, uncharacteristic snort and the corner of Sigrid’s mouth twitched.
“No, darling. We are going into the city.”
“Oh good, that’ll be fun,” Klaus said cheerfully. “Hey, Sasha, have you ever been shopping at the farmer’s market? We should start there first!”
“I… It depends on what Lady Sigrid wants…” Sasha glanced at Sigrid, who inclined her head slightly to indicate he was being included.
Finally, Sasha gave her a real smile.
Ignoring Karl’s disapproving look, Sigrid leaned against the desk. “Well, we do have a mission, so we can’t just dilly-dally.”
“A mission!” Klaus lit up. “Don’t tell me… we’re going incognito?”
Sigrid smiled. “Yes.”
“That’s even better than a foursome!” Sasha punched the air. “We’re going to my costume closet, right now!”
“I don’t need a disguise,” Sasha said quickly, but Klaus laughed and threw his arm around Sasha’s shoulders.
“Sure, but you can’t go out in that! Everyone will know you came from the castle!”
